| Description: | An impression of a recent training seminar for ASTRON/JIVE middle management, conducted by a senior partner of our regular Elbonian consultancy group (left). It is well-known that the Dutch are a friendly and rather timid race, constantly in danger of being trampled underfoot by more predatory foreigners. Traditionally, we deal with this by hiring foreigners to be assertive for us, but although this has certainly helped, it does not really solve the problem. Therefore, it was decided to make a start by acquainting our middle managers with modern methods of enforcing project deadlines, and staying within budget.
The picture shows an exercise in the difficult (and alien) art of displaying credible treatening behaviour with one hand, while restraining back-stabbing by other middle managers with the other hand. Unfortunately, since they do not have a third hand, there is no room for offering incentives to the workforce (so much for Intelligent Design!). To compensate, the procedure is highly ritualized, in keeping with Dutch culture. Eventually, this ritual will replace the prevailing, but obscenely ineffective procedure of 'meetings'. |
